In my lifetime I have really only followed two sports teams: your Minnesota Twins and the Minnesota Football Vikings. Sure, I got swept up in the KG years with the Woofies but I was more like some Hollywood star who shows up at Lakers' games during the playoffs than I am an "triangle offense" guy. And yes, I follow hockey, more at the college level than the pro level but that's more because I live in Minnesota and it's part of our everyday life. But baseball, with it's long march and enough stats to satisfy even the Lambda Lambda Lambda's, and pro football, with the violent hits and sweet finesse plays, have been my sports and the Twins and Vikes have been my teams.
Recently, rumors about one of my teams has left me stunned - Brett Favre is coming back to the NFL and is going to be wearing Purple and Gold. You see, for the past 16 years I have watched my Vikings battle the likes of one Brett Lorenzo Favre (yes, that is his middle name, I looked it up, I always hated the name Lorenzo.) For the last 16 years I have had to hear it from every cheesehead motor-mouth drunken Sconny how awesome Favre is. For the past 16 years I have had to hear everyone from John Madden to Chris Mortensen to Peter King talk like 8th girls about their man-crush for Favre. And for the past 16 years I have had to quietly sit waiting for Favre to retire so that the Packers can once again suck. Last March, when Favre finally hung them up, I watched Packer's fans as they cried in the Schlitz (douchebags) and everyone was lauding his career for weeks on end like Ghandi had just been laid to rest. I, on the other hand, did a little jig. While I don't have his career numbers against the Vikings, I would imagine it to be around .500 or a little better (parity does reign in the NFL especially when you play a team twice a year), and it's not so much that he “worked” the Vikings year in and year out or that there is a particular play that stands out in my mind as the ultimate "Vikings-killer" it's just that I was tired of Favre; I was "over him" and ready to move on.
Fast forward to Lorenzo's unretirement/reinstatement/24x7 media coverage and the indications that Favre wants to be a Viking and my utter shock. The thought of having to root for him suiting up in the Purple and Gold absolutely kills me. What I can't wrap my head around is that all of my fellow Vikings supporters think this is a good idea. Forget the fact that he is 39 years old or that Childress has been grooming TJac for the better part of 2 years to take the helm of a 'loaded' Vikings team, this is Brett Favre. Some might cite the old adage "don't cut off your nose to spite your face" well, you know what, fuck the nose, go ahead and cut it off. Watching 16 weeks of football games and "rooting" for Brett Favre? I don't care if I am "shortsighted", I care more about the last 16 years when I hated this guy each and every week and especially twice a season when he lined up across the field. All the wonks around town who say that it would great to have Brett at QB and take a shot at the Superbowl need to move over the border. Yeah, 10 years ago I could see this but now? Did you see him last year in the NFC Championship game? Where was the magic? Imagine him coming back, playing for the Vikes and not making the playoffs or getting booted after the first round or even throwing some interception that cost us everything?
I guess what I am saying is that I would rather lose with TJac than win with Favre. And for all of you who feel otherwise, think about this: Monday night, Pack v. Vikes, Lambeau field, Favre in Purple, do you honestly think he is going to be able to keep his emotions in check? Dollars to doughnuts you will be saying "Fucking Favre" in the same tone you did over the last 16 years just for totally opposite reasons.
