FTLOSBW Moves HQ; Help Wanted

The last official Minnesota resident of FTLOSBW has left the L'Etoile du Nord and gone on to the nation's Capitol (pending closure of sale of Jan's dojo on Sept 21.) very exciting times but leaves the vacant spot of someone who lives in Gods Country posting on FTLOSBW. Applicants apply within.

Note: passing thru Cleveland last evening picked up the pre-game and first few innings of the Tribe's visit to TF. All the chatter was how the Indians were now surging having won two of three from les Tigres (with a dramatic beating of Verlander to close the series.). All the pre-game featured excited players being interviewed one in particular was a cocky Indians pitcher who said the next two series against the twins and royals were basically guaranteed wins. The early innings I heard from Indian radio network proceeded to recap the twins last decade of futility in painful fashion (6 division titles with only one ALCS appearance etc.) with a rather large dump being taken squarely on Joe Mauer. Reap the whirlwind Tribe Nation! Reap it!

Now for some pictures of rain storms across the Heartland.

Jason Kubel: Biding his Time Before He Chokes. Clever.

So, to continue to rub our face in Carl Pohlad's Ghost's shit, it looks like our former, occasionally healthy, outfielder is leading the NL in RBI. I'm happy for him.  But don't get too excited Diamond Back fans. You're not going anywhere, trust me.  And I know that because as soon as you start sniffing playoff panties you can take the K off Kubel's jersey and just put it on the scorecard.  I want to point out that he hit .069 in three playoff appearances.  In 2009 he struck out 9 times in 14 at bats.  Amazingly, it's hard to say if that was actually his worst performance, since 2010 rivaled it for sure, hitting a crisp .00000 (I added to the extra two zeroes for effect -- you can put them anywhere in that number and it won't change anything).  On the plus side, he only had two strikeouts that year in 8 at bats.  Mind you he walked 3 times, and i bet if you look it up they were on full counts, so those probably could have gone either way.   I'm still bitter at those horrifyingly bad games. But I do wish him luck, because i like him  But I don't forgive him.  Nope. And fuck you too, Joe Nathan. 

Hey look, it's Somalia Car!

Minneapolis is safer now that this is on the streets. Surprised it omitted the Jolly Roger flags. 

FTLOSBW Does TF First Class

Got the invite to the Champions Club at TF.  Aside from the drubbing at the hands of the A's, it was awesome.

Double secret valet entrance.  Next to players lot. On way out drove past Terry Ryan walking to his car (brush with fame!)

Fitting that Jack Morris greets you at the check-in desk

Doors to the Champions Club.  I didn't take any inside pics of the restaurant or bar - think Vegas buffet.  Anything you could want to drink or eat all free except mixed drinks.

1987.  Awesome.  (Click on pic to zoom, trophy were flanked by the 1965 American League Championship ring and the '87 WS ring.

1991. Awesome. Flanked by WS ring.

Our seats.  I could smell Mauer, it was a mixture of rose water, sweat, urine, and chocolate.

There was a small merchandise kiosk in the Club but they didn't have a "M" hat (I think we should all switch from the TC hats as a gesture of hope and change.)  I went to the larger store during the 4th inning and saw this.  Come on, Twins, sell a fucking Plouffe or Willingham jersey, will ya?  And get more "M" hats, I want an adjustable one that isn't for a 7 year old.

Game worn by Puck-Jesus himself.

Right by the crappers.

Not a ton of awesome memorabilia outside of the trophies in the Club but some cool pics.

Wood

Reggie Jackson is a Stupid Asshole

I wish Billy Martin had actually hit him in the fucking face.  So, while everyone was spinning around talking about the fact that Mr. October made a fairly undeniably accurate statement that A-Rod's numbers will be tainted by the fact that he cheated -- he did cheat which by definition should sort of taint your results - but anyway, did everyone miss that he took a shot at Kirby??

Kirby doesn't belong in the hall of fame?  Hey Reggie: you had 2584 hits in 21 fucking seasons.  Kirby had 2300 in 12.  At his pace, if he had kept playing,  he would virtually fucking lap you, you stupid, arrogant piece of dogshit.   Oh, and by comparison, Reggie, you averaged 81 RBI a season -- by the way playing for the yankees, and the good A's years -- and Kirby averaged, hold on -- 91.  Whoops. And that was playing for the Twins -- pretty much shitty in all but three of his years.

Oh, and Reggie, you hold the World Record for Strikeouts.   By the way, is Jim Thome a Hall of Famer, Reggie?  He has more Home Runs than you. I am so glad you finished 10 home runs shy of Killebrew.  I wish he had said you don't deserve to be in the Hall of Fame if you have anything less than 570 Home runs.

Oh, and by the way, you sucked in Naked Gun.

FTLOSBW - I found this baseball card the Rick Aguilera edition

I just wish it wasn't so bent up, so much value here.

This was his first year of a 16 year career, two WS titles (Mets, Twins) and 254 saves for the Twins

FTLOSBW - DYoung sighting

He's grown a stache but he's still Delmon. I was his biggest fan and wanted him to do well with the twins. FYI - .263 BA and 6 dingers. Yuck.

Happy FTLOSBW of July!